For Women Only: 16 Tips to Make Him Smile

I had several ladies thank me for my last column of 16 Tips for Men. Now I’ll turn my attention to the ladies and offer my 16 tips to the wives, culled from the secret thoughts and desires of men everywhere as taken from counseling sessions, disclosures over lunch, and my 48 years of experience as a certified member of the Testosterone Club. Here is your man’s wish list.

The Ladies List

1. Men are performers. Tell him what he does well and what he does that you appreciate. Tell him you’re proud of him. Men are still boys who like to show off and impress a girl like you.
2. Walk up behind him and start massaging his shoulders. While much of his weight may be avalanching to his stomach area, he still carries a lot of weight on his shoulders.
3. Tell your girlfriends more about what he does well and does right; gripe less about his shortcomings. Try bragging about him the way you boast about your kids.
4. Don’t wear baggy sweat pants and a t-shirt on Saturdays any longer than absolutely necessary.
5. Don’t reserve your perfume for special occasions only. He’ll never tire of his favorite fragrance on you.
6. Don’t be afraid of his ideas. He’s not going to sell the house and buy an RV tomorrow. If you repeatedly point out what’s wrong with his ideas or opinions, then he’ll stop sharing either with you. And you’ll wonder why he doesn’t talk.
7. Tell him he’s a good father. He has his doubts, especially when he compares himself to Cliff Huxtable. He fears what his children will someday tell their therapist about him.
8. Don’t reprimand him as though he were a 4th grader. You don’t have to point out and correct all his mistakes as though they were grammatical errors in an English essay.
9. Don’t assume that flavored lip gloss is just for 15 year old girls who giggle a lot. Surprise him with strawberry flavored lips. If kissing you reminds him of candy that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
10. Getting along with his Dad is probably easy. Bonus points for accepting and loving his mother.
11. Tell him that he’s handsome and a great lover. Then watch him fix your breakfast, organize the garage, sell his bass boat, and build a gazebo all before 9A.M.
12. Don’t coach or critique his driving. If you don’t like how fast he drives or how closely he follows the car in front of him close your eyes or take a cab.
13. Tell him that a cluttered garage is a sign of creativity and genius.
14. Don’t ask him to go shopping with you. A man doesn’t “shop”. He’s a hunter. He walks into Home Depot, spots the item he came for, shoots it, bags it, and brings it home, and mounts it.
15. Disregard #14 when it comes to his purchase of a car, truck, lawn mower, or power tools, in which his decision making process will take longer than health care reform. Don’t offer to go with him “car shopping” unless it’s for a mini-van. If indeed the search is for a mini-van don’t bother asking why he looks so depressed.
16. Shock him occasionally with an out-of-the-blue, aggressive, passionate kiss and then casually walk away. He won’t know what hit him. Let him wonder…was that strawberry?


Author, columnist, and marriage therapy specialist, Ramon Presson is the founder of the Marriage Center of Franklin. Visit him at www.MarriageCenterofFranklin.com or contact him at ramon@ramonpresson.com (615) 319-6450. View the prequel to this column, For Men Only: Vital Tips (and previously published columns) at www.rpcolumns.blogspot.com